Gadstragjap is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, amazing octopus.

Gadstragjap created matter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gadstragjap, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gadstragjap, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Gadstragjap's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Gadstragjap's Holy Commandments

1. Gadstragjap loves eagles, so they must be honoured.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not speak about figs.

4. Retreat if seven great tits approach from the north.

5. Do not trade with those who eat apples.