Hotdagmilcan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, selfish shrew.

Hotdagmilcan created a down quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hotdagmilcan, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Hotdagmilcan, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Hotdagmilcan's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Hotdagmilcan's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hotdagmilcan.

4. Never feed carrots to grasshopers while wearing jumpers.

5. Do not skip in public.