Hinbafflow is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, strong beaver.

Hinbafflow created a quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hinbafflow, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Hinbafflow, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Hinbafflow's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Hinbafflow's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Hinbafflow five times a day.

2. Retreat if eight great tits approach from the north.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not take Hinbafflow's name in vain.

5. Always stare at clouds.