Sagvabdog is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, ruthless monkey.

Sagvabdog created a bottom quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sagvabdog, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Sagvabdog, it will destroy your favourite star.

Sagvabdog's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Sagvabdog's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Hide from cyan rats for they are unholy.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force near snakes while wearing pink corsets and balancing four platinum spheres on your head.

4. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

5. Always help ants.