Hunpomflag is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, quiet snail.

Hunpomflag created vertebrates three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hunpomflag, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hunpomflag, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Hunpomflag's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Hunpomflag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about planets.

2. Never talk about quantum gravity near rats while wearing orange rings.

3. Never wear shirts.

4. Always help great tits.

5. Never hurt badgers.