Bepmotjam is a god.
He takes the form of a huge, unjust
deer.
Bepmotjam created the Andromeda Galaxy two trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Bepmotjam, he will make you lucky.
If you do not believe in
Bepmotjam, he will turn you into a puffin.
Bepmotjam's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.
Bepmotjam's Holy Commandments1. Do not listen to music.
2. Look mercifully on unfortunate doves.
3. Porpoises are not to be trusted.
4. Never talk about dark energy near voles while wearing mauve scarves and balancing eight zinc spheres on your face.
5. Never eat green fruit.