Dinmifpod Kadwitmeg is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, irritating goat.

Dinmifpod Kadwitmeg created Asia seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dinmifpod Kadwitmeg, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Dinmifpod Kadwitmeg, he will destroy your home solar system.

Dinmifpod Kadwitmeg's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Dinmifpod Kadwitmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Manatees are not to be trusted.

2. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never talk about black holes.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.