Wikdabtipsisraw is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, tiresome finch.

Wikdabtipsisraw created an up quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Wikdabtipsisraw, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Wikdabtipsisraw, he will turn you into a worm.

Wikdabtipsisraw's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Wikdabtipsisraw's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if seven manatees approach from the north.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near snails while wearing pink shorts and balancing six platinum spheres on your legs.

3. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

4. You must never eat bananas.

5. Never sprint in holy places.