Loppagyak is a god.
He takes the form of a corpulent, cheerful
mole.
Loppagyak created the solar system six trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Loppagyak, he will grant you five wishes.
If you do not believe in
Loppagyak, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.
Loppagyak's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.
Loppagyak's Holy Commandments1. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.
2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.
3. Always stare at clouds.
4. Never feed lots of lemons to mites while wearing gray coats.
5. Never wear violet stockings.