Cumtigranlip is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, unjust shark.

Cumtigranlip created an electron five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cumtigranlip, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cumtigranlip, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Cumtigranlip's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Cumtigranlip's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics near tortoises while wearing gray kilts and balancing eight zinc spheres on your neck.

2. Run away if five doves approach from the north.

3. Cumtigranlip loves swans, so they must be honoured.

4. Erect nine gold sculptures of Cumtigranlip on top of important buildings.

5. Never wear white tights.