Yoksomvan is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, temperamental wasp.

Yoksomvan created the cosmos nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Yoksomvan, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yoksomvan, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Yoksomvan's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Yoksomvan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Yoksomvan's name in vain.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Erect a large gold sculpture of Yoksomvan on top of all buildings.

5. Do not covet oxen.