Largsawnart is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, emotional hare.

Largsawnart created the planet Earth six billion years ago.

If you believe in Largsawnart, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Largsawnart, she will turn you into a tree.

Largsawnart's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Largsawnart's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at planets.

2. Do not wear nickel on your body.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never go into cyan rooms.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.