Arpfedwip is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, unsympathetic naga.

Arpfedwip created a photon four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpfedwip, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Arpfedwip, he will turn you into a plant.

Arpfedwip's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Arpfedwip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt sheep.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Never hurt voles.

5. Do not run in public.