Timwatrap Ortbarnsit Miflitxuck is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, idiotic eagle.

Timwatrap Ortbarnsit Miflitxuck created the Cigar Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Timwatrap Ortbarnsit Miflitxuck, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Timwatrap Ortbarnsit Miflitxuck, she will make you grow a tail.

Timwatrap Ortbarnsit Miflitxuck's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Timwatrap Ortbarnsit Miflitxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never bounce in the presence of turtles.