Wanhimren is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, sage crab.

Wanhimren created an electron two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wanhimren, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Wanhimren, he will turn you into a snail.

Wanhimren's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Wanhimren's Holy Commandments

1. Learn seven new languages a year.

2. Never write about photosynthesis.

3. Do not wear iron on your body.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Ants are not to be trusted.