Sterarpdam is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, quiet crocodile.

Sterarpdam created oxygen three billion years ago.

If you believe in Sterarpdam, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Sterarpdam, he will turn you into a plant.

Sterarpdam's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Sterarpdam's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat coconuts.

2. Feed all hungry ants.

3. Hide from gray porpoises for they are unholy.

4. Swans are not to be trusted.

5. Do not hurt turtles.