Cusscebfon is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, smart rhinoceros.

Cusscebfon created the Andromeda Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Cusscebfon, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cusscebfon, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Cusscebfon's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Cusscebfon's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.

3. Never think about chromosomes.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never talk about fire.