Stipparkxin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, contented seal.

Stipparkxin created matter twelve years ago.

If you believe in Stipparkxin, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Stipparkxin, he will be mildly annoyed.

Stipparkxin's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Stipparkxin's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

3. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Always wear mauve.

5. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in yellow.