Paktipsag is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, humane dryad.

Paktipsag created matter five billion years ago.

If you believe in Paktipsag, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Paktipsag, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Paktipsag's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Paktipsag's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed carrots to sharks while wearing hats.

2. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in turquoise.

3. Learn eight new languages a year.

4. Do not speak about bananas.

5. Never hurt ants.