Yarpdanvan is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, dishonourable rat.

Yarpdanvan created time and space eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarpdanvan, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yarpdanvan, he will think nothing of it.

Yarpdanvan's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Yarpdanvan's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap in holy places.

2. Never think ill of sick snakes.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never laugh near sheep.