Nilcambot is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, contented centipede.

Nilcambot created tapeworms five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilcambot, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Nilcambot, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Nilcambot's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Nilcambot's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

4. Always wear green.

5. Do not take Nilcambot's name in vain.