Ruttmisnarthugflat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, omniscient cat.

Ruttmisnarthugflat created the planet Jupiter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ruttmisnarthugflat, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Ruttmisnarthugflat, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Ruttmisnarthugflat's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Ruttmisnarthugflat's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

2. Always wear black.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never sit near dogs.