Jarntarbit is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, sage skunk.

Jarntarbit created matter four billion years ago.

If you believe in Jarntarbit, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Jarntarbit, she will turn you into a snail.

Jarntarbit's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Jarntarbit's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear boots.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Jarntarbit in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never hurt ants.

5. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.