Yatnurlbut is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, astonishing eagle.

Yatnurlbut created oxygen two million years ago.

If you believe in Yatnurlbut, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yatnurlbut, he will curse you with boils.

Yatnurlbut's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Yatnurlbut's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Always wear fawn.

3. Never talk about spacetime.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never write about ribonucleic acid.