Lopbarntin is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, charitable raven.

Lopbarntin created bats three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lopbarntin, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Lopbarntin, he will try to impress you with trees.

Lopbarntin's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Lopbarntin's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Lopbarntin.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Lopbarntin on top of all buildings.