Gigstragstik is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, wise pig.

Gigstragstik created vertebrates three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gigstragstik, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Gigstragstik, he will refuse to believe in you.

Gigstragstik's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Gigstragstik's Holy Commandments

1. Never hop in holy places.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not make images of living things.