Pinyatthad is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, generous camel.

Pinyatthad created a top quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pinyatthad, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Pinyatthad, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Pinyatthad's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Pinyatthad's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never wear scarves.