Xemvenjon is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, thoughtless warg.

Xemvenjon created the cosmos five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Xemvenjon, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Xemvenjon, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Xemvenjon's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Xemvenjon's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Learn three new languages a year.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never look in ponds.