Yattjigdav is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, deceitful gerbil.

Yattjigdav created dark matter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Yattjigdav, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Yattjigdav, she will turn you into a frog.

Yattjigdav's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Yattjigdav's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

2. Pray towards the south.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never think about planets.

5. Never hurt tortoises.