Danbattik is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, happy squirrel.

Danbattik created vertebrates nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Danbattik, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Danbattik, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Danbattik's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Danbattik's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always treat dogs with great respect.

3. Never talk about snakes.

4. Retreat if three sheep approach from the south.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.