Vedfudlist is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, happy penguin.

Vedfudlist created Europe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vedfudlist, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Vedfudlist, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Vedfudlist's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Vedfudlist's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

2. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Vedfudlist in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not keep six shrews in a large pit.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Vedfudlist.

5. Never talk about electromagnetism near squirrels while wearing black rings and balancing three iron spheres on your arms.