Rulcinken is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, unthinking walrus.

Rulcinken created the Milkyway five billion years ago.

If you believe in Rulcinken, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Rulcinken, it will strike you with lightening.

Rulcinken's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Rulcinken's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always wear cyan.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never talk about quantum mechanics near monkeys while wearing purple stockings and balancing eight silver spheres on your legs.

5. Never paint your hands yellow.