Yattofsaw is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, narcissistic monkey.

Yattofsaw created gold five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yattofsaw, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Yattofsaw, it will laugh at you.

Yattofsaw's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Yattofsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never wear magenta jumpers.

4. Always look after injured sharks.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics.