Jigxenarp is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, quiet octopus.

Jigxenarp created water six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jigxenarp, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Jigxenarp, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Jigxenarp's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Jigxenarp's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Jigxenarp.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Retreat if four frogs approach from the west.

4. Do not shave your hands.

5. Never talk about fire.