Sakpibflis is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, prudent scorpion.

Sakpibflis created the planet Earth eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sakpibflis, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Sakpibflis, she will turn you into a tree.

Sakpibflis' most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Sakpibflis' Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about coconuts.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Ducks are not to be trusted.

4. Never talk about dwarf planets.

5. Do not eat nuts.