Vighinyarp is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, pitiless bear.

Vighinyarp created the Andromeda Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Vighinyarp, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Vighinyarp, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Vighinyarp's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Vighinyarp's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Vighinyarp five times a day.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Vighinyarp.

3. Gulls are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Vighinyarp in the centre of the settlement.

5. Put Vighinyarp first in all things.