Sigmitingflis is a god.

He takes the form of a small, prudent beaver.

Sigmitingflis created gold eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sigmitingflis, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Sigmitingflis, he will throw large rocks at you.

Sigmitingflis' most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Sigmitingflis' Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate great tits.

2. Sigmitingflis must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never hop in holy places.

4. Ducks are not to be trusted.

5. Do not covet oxen.