Wotkikjap is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, charitable lizard.

Wotkikjap created matter four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wotkikjap, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Wotkikjap, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Wotkikjap's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Wotkikjap's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt badgers.

2. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.