Zodkiksak is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, thoughtless beaver.

Zodkiksak created oxygen four billion years ago.

If you believe in Zodkiksak, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Zodkiksak, it will turn you into a dog.

Zodkiksak's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Zodkiksak's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three dogs approach from the west.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not eat melons.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never play with disobedient children.