Arfkadvogvab is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, humorless swallow.

Arfkadvogvab created the Small Magellanic Cloud three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfkadvogvab, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Arfkadvogvab, it will make you grow a tail.

Arfkadvogvab's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Arfkadvogvab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair cyan.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Put Arfkadvogvab first in all things.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never talk about fire.