Tail is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, staggering camel.

Tail created the universe six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tail, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tail, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Tail's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Tail's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Do not wear blue clothing.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never eat bark.