Bigmapfet is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, fast crow.

Bigmapfet created Africa four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bigmapfet, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bigmapfet, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Bigmapfet's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Bigmapfet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep seven rats in a large pit.

2. Do not wear purple clothing.

3. Do not wear platinum on your body.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never hop near swans.