Yimmetcamgeb is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, strong naga.

Yimmetcamgeb created the solar system three million years ago.

If you believe in Yimmetcamgeb, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Yimmetcamgeb, she will turn you into a dog.

Yimmetcamgeb's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Yimmetcamgeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never write about chromosomes.

3. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Yimmetcamgeb.

5. Yimmetcamgeb loves porpoises, so they must be respected.