Quatbadvol is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, pitiless pigeon.

Quatbadvol created parasitic wasps six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quatbadvol, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Quatbadvol, he will manifest in front of you.

Quatbadvol's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Quatbadvol's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Hide from blue dogs for they are unholy.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

5. Never feed lemons to swans while wearing red ear rings.