Wiktafstan is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, flying clam.

Wiktafstan created a photon three billion years ago.

If you believe in Wiktafstan, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Wiktafstan, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Wiktafstan's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Wiktafstan's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Wiktafstan loves birds, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not wear tin on your body.

4. Never write about eukaryotes.

5. Do not covet oxen.