Ransandaf Bidbancim is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, stupid badger.

Ransandaf Bidbancim created snails three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ransandaf Bidbancim, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Ransandaf Bidbancim, he will turn you into a goat.

Ransandaf Bidbancim's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Ransandaf Bidbancim's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from purple birds, for they are unholy.

2. Hide from cyan eagles for they are unholy.

3. Always treat sheep with great respect.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate squirrels.

5. Always obey Ransandaf Bidbancim's priests.