Tadzogmil is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, unfair snail.

Tadzogmil created the planet Venus three billion years ago.

If you believe in Tadzogmil, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tadzogmil, he will turn you into a mouse.

Tadzogmil's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Tadzogmil's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of grasshopers.

2. Never wear purple ear rings.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never think ill of sick goats.

5. Always pray immersed in water.