Arpweebun is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, loving chicken.

Arpweebun created the Cigar Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arpweebun, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Arpweebun, he will turn you into a hamster.

Arpweebun's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Arpweebun's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate aardvarks.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Arpweebun.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Arpweebun loves grasshopers, so they must be honoured.

5. Always make sure there are no geese in a building before entering it.