Zedzagren is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, sage aardvark.

Zedzagren created Mount Everest two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zedzagren, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Zedzagren, he will turn you into a dog.

Zedzagren's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Zedzagren's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Retreat if seven dolphins approach from the west.

4. Never look at stars.

5. Do not jump in public.