Zendissaf Quam is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, happy mole.

Zendissaf Quam created Europe two years ago.

If you believe in Zendissaf Quam, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Zendissaf Quam, it will turn you into a tree.

Zendissaf Quam's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Zendissaf Quam's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Zendissaf Quam.

3. Zendissaf Quam loves ants, so they must be respected.

4. Always help sick porpoises.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.